Sitting in the waiting room
makes me wish for
privacy booths
Where I don’t have to pretend
to be idly passing the time
instead of waiting
with held, stilted breath
to find out if I’m a goner
Where I don’t have to engage
in furtive smiles of pity
or faux understanding
and be subjected to
out of date, tattered magazines
Give me a curtain I can draw
and a a quiet spot
blocking out diffused mood lighting
and pop songs turned elevator music
Waiting for the unknown is hard enough
without it being such a public display
My life’s about to change
I can’t sit here any longer
and pretend its another Tuesday
Testing
Really trying here
Think I may burst
I’ve never been patient
But this is too much
The waiting
Hurts to breathe
I can wait the half hour for the cake to bake
I can wait for the show to be continued
I can wait for him to take his coat off before I grab and hug and greet him
The minutes in the waiting room are intolerable
The magazines suck
The rug is ugly
The people are all trying too hard to be silent and avoid eye contact
And some are waiting to hear if they’re dying
I don’t know how I can sit here waiting to be poked and prodded
When I’m screaming so loudly
My head is pounding
They may have to pick me up off the floor
Really trying to be mindful and joyful
But this blows
The waiting
The ugliness
The choking back fear and trying to look normal
Ah, now it’s my turn.




