Bent

 

just a little bent
askew
akimbo
a little twisted
they said
was it my inability to bend their way
or my distaste of the current patterns
or could it have been
when I stood
alone
and like a banshee
(or siren)
I screamed
all the rancid thoughts
I knew they were having
but they kept to themselves
as they rotted from the inside
while I’m purged
and clean
but bent
like a willow in the wind

Void

 

she shuffled forward ever so carefully on the cliff’s edge
was surprised to see a verdant valley below
instead of the tumultuous chasm she felt brewing
if she but lifted her hands she might touch the fluffy bottom of the swollen clouds
the jagged rock under her toes reminded her where she belonged

she stood on that edge until the sun’s rays cut the sky like fresh scars
flickering lights became stars in the inky dome above

finally the tears came
she could not form words

twinkling dreams dashed
bubbly hopes demolished
tender heart destroyed
what was left but to carry on in her brittle shell
devoid of texture, taste
only vaguely recalling warmth
would her colors ever return
or had the betrayers taken her spark when they took all else she had to give

Aching

 

I wonder at this ache
that seems to carry me
as much as I carry it like a great weight
Aching so much that it takes hours
of staring at a swirling ceiling
before sleep claims me
but never for long
as it hurts too much to dream away the night
Demons are supposed to like the night
but mine follow me at dawn and noon
impervious to distraction or daydreams
When I buried so many ghosts
I thought I’d be free of pain
but that’s not how it seems to work
for they’re not done with me
’til I’m buried

the game

found myself on queue
awaiting my turn
to my right was a tramp
to my left a pirate
how would we fare
in competition
I can be ruthless and play dirty
or I can be selfless and lend a hand
but something tells me
I need to bring my A game
the Indian sits sagely on the side
the opera diva chomping at the bit
I’ll wait a bit
gauge the skill of my opponents

wait

there’s nobody against me
in front of us are our mirror images
we have to find our own weak spots
exploit them to get ahead
no moving forward
without sacrificing something
our pride, our cynicism
would be the first to go
but we’re not all that smart
the strategy is not clear
just keep moving is key
don’t over-think
use instincts we’ve so long suppressed
play the game

Unfettered

the canvas is too large
I am used to dealing in miniatures
how am I supposed to fill up the space
when my wit has always had narrow bounds
do I dare leave much white space
room for the eye to breathe
or is that as dangerous
as filling their heads with tripe and travesty
I’m torn
between being honest or being liked
the confines have been chaffing me
and I long to break out
the mold that used to fit so well
is squeezing me dry
my comfort is choking me
may I unfetter my thoughts
let them roam freely
what if they get picked up
and carried by the winds
will others step up
to take their place
will I always have this struggle with myself
the trees and the forest and the cliches therein
will there be at least one person who will hear
and care and understand
maybe that doesn’t matter
when it’s me I have to please

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