Hollow Balloon

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He moved so smoothly through me
So deftly he stole my pride
So swiftly my heart
He always seemed in shadow
Hidden
Hollow
We stared out his window
Sultry summer
Sweet heavy air
We spoke of poets and moons
Never doubting
Never counting
He held the moment like a balloon on a string
He held me like I was new
But the balloon and I were let go easily
We knew our little story
We didn’t need any others
But there’s always an end
He can’t pretend
We can’t go back
That little room above the shop is locked.

Queen of Spades

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Hail, queen of the idiots!
I am to be revered for all my quirks and foibles.
You must feel like bowing in the face of such incompetence.
Or at least feel like running away.
No truer words need be said besides touting all the times I’ve tripped and erred.
I’m not sure I’d recognize the right path no matter how well trimmed and lit;
I much prefer making things hard on myself.
Life may be difficult, but I only wallow in comfort when I’m in extreme discomfort.
Have things ever gone smoothly?
Of course but the times were fleeting at best.
Do we rise to our stupidity? Sink to our depravity?
What makes us keep trying?
Do connections really count or is all the time we spend an excuse and distraction from the torment we hold at bay, the fate that we know lurks around the corner.
Hope abandoned long ago, my heart has atrophied.
The only fluttering I feel is the moths flying out of the closet.

Carve a Tapestry

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There’s nothing I wouldn’t do, though I may be slower finding my place
It’s hard finding a place to step between the cracks
Carving a path when there are signs pointing another way

My goals are vague
My morals suspect
My fears are like everyone’s
My ideas are my own

There’s never been a time I felt at ease, though I don’t have those aspirations any longer
It’s tough to be satisfied as you set to expose an approved self
Creating a figure out of so many others’ threads

You’re a tapestry
Your voice rings true
You have a place with me.

Gone

Finally a minute to breathe and I find you gone
So much noise to sift through
Too many choices
I’m sorry I’m so weak
I couldn’t tear my eyes away
The ugliness drew me in
I was listless and lost
The phantom sensations and tastes were magic
No thought was necessary
Only feeling
A whole day wasted
When it could have been with you

Thunder

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thunder
rumbled, rolled
filled my body
I couldn’t move
for the weight
of the air
thick with meanness
dark with answers
that I wasn’t looking for
my toes curled
my palms itched
without seeing
I heard the roar
tasted the tangy wave
ideas crashed into me
rapture called
terrifyingly beautiful
thunder

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