existence naturally

twelve miles or so – but it could have been days away
who can measure time or distance
when sheer depletion of thought, exhaustion of spirit
completely swallow existence

only sense and instinct propel, habit holds sway

your mind keeps a holding pattern
while your feet move by some unseen force
it is not bravery or intelligence
we are animals
it is instinct
survival

to stop and reflect
could mean drowning or being swept away by a wind storm
whatever demon element you allow
still waters may be deep but they are also deadly serious
the wind may cry but it can also be held

heroism is skipping stones and flying kites

quiet play

you’ll always be there
on that shabby playground
tracing cracks in the pavement
sidestepping ladybugs
conversing with daddy long-legs
bending chalk lines
racing beside me against time
wanting recess to last the whole day
praying summer would come soon
pretending we were characters in books
drawing our dream house in the dust
noticing how the moon peeked out sometimes during the day
drinking the honeysuckle that gathered by the fence
swinging beside me
just quietly being
the best part of my day

bus depot

sweet diesel coats the tongue
sliding home in crusty cloth seats
air brakes a melodious lullaby

shabby coats with cigarette burns
flickering fluorescent light
coffee stained flimsy paper ticket to freedom
sloppy kisses, tears of discomfort

cycle

dawn:
there’s indeed shame in the wanting
though it seems just beyond me
baser instincts take hold
thrash me like a shark with prey
it’s my fault really
looking for absolution
on an idiots playground

dusk:
if I could just remember how I got here
I found something buried
am still dusting it off
whether it’s diamond or obsidian
it’s mine, for me
I’m very tempted to leave it buried
or at least carry the filthy burden
in my pocket

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