They Find Me Out

Too tired to try again today
So many ideas
I’m just repeating myself
Nobody’s listening anyway
No matter what name I use
They find me out
Silly me
For thinking I can start over
When the only things new
Are pretend
And exist only in my head
If only I could be the one
People tune in to hear
Or look to for oddly compelling beauty
But I’ve been the back-up
The last hurrah
Coming through in a pinch
To everyone’s surprise
Because they hadn’t known
Or they had forgotten
The depths I generally visited
Were my comfort zone
And I could speak the language of anguish
So I shouldn’t be so shocked
And put down
When they don’t turn to me
For fun and games
Even though
I’ve always liked to play.